pizza and cheesecake

we got in and i thought there would be a moment of rest, a moment where nothing was on the agenda, just a moment.

phone buzzes. i got added to an exploration group staying in the same area and they want to know if we’re ready to look for dinner. no! no! no!

but i have kids and we’re on our own for food now so were given a list of popular eateries to try out all within walking distance. i’m reading the chat and wondering how overnight i turned into someone that walked everywhere. skinny or fat i walk slow and as if i have broken hips. it’s not a thing i’ve tried to correct because 80% of the time i’m walking alone. it means that if I were pulled over by a cop and given a sobriety test and be stone cold sober i’d be arrested for dui. i don’t walk straight – never have, and if someone is walking next to me i will certainly walk into them at some point. whatever.

so it’s nighttime and we’re walking through the alley dodging mopeds as i’m bumping into people and stray dogs until thirty minutes later we’re at the pizza place and i’m the only one looking sauna-fied. i head to the toilet to dry my face and a woman stops me who thinks i work there. for two hundred reasons that made no logical sense and after a minute of me denying i didn’t work there she apologized and then bowed. sigh. i smiled and bowed in return clueless about what the f*@! we were bowing for.

service reminds me of where i was born. people show up to saloons called restaurants and there’s no one to greet them when they walk through the door. you gotta call out and ask if anyone is ‘home’. usually a woman in an apron who looks like she could be everyone’s grandmother appears and asks about where you came from before telling you to sit wherever you like. there’s no menu in sight so you wait for her return and right about when you get up to look for her she shows up outta nowhere with a glass of water and a sticky menu that adheres to your hands like velcro.

it took about an hour before the food came so we talked about the most random assortment of useless shit we could think of cause we were all burned out from a week of pure vulnerability. the kids finally got to eat something 180 degrees south of nature and us adults got to pick something to drink other than flower water.
i started wiggling in my chair trying to figure out just how many creatures had crawled up my pants because out of nowhere my upper thigh felt like it had the chicken pox and oh hell the itching made it worse. the cough returned a few days ago, so in between bites, itching, twisting in my chair and turning away to cough every few seconds, and beginning a new round of profuse sweating, I was positive i looked like someone on meth.

everyone should have been full but they all opted for dessert. i couldn’t eat anymore and manage the eeyore complex slowing moving over my face in opposition to my Trainspotting demeanor. a half hour passes before it’s served. cheesecake purposefully formed into the shape of a tapeworm. they ate it. in my head i was placing bets on who’d spend the night in the loo.

check comes. no one knows how much it is so they pull out their phones and we wait another thirty minutes before being checked out.

we head out and my dreams of taking a bath have vanished, buried beneath exhaustion. the pool looked like a cesspool of mold so I put my bathing suit away. all I needed and wanted was a cold shower and it was perfect, a perfect end to the longest day ever.

but onward we go and tomorrow i’m off to get tattooed and learn more about whatever there is to learn.

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